Funny Sayings and Quotes


1. A lawyer with a briefcase can steal more than a thousand men with guns.

2. They say hard work never hurts anybody, but why take the chance.

3. I wished the buck stopped here as I could use a few.

4. If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught?

5. Guy: “Haven’t we met before?”
Lady: “Maybe. I’m the receptionist at the VD Clinic.”

6. How can 'You're so cool' and 'You're not so hot' be different?

7. A day without sun shine is like, you know, night.

8. If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?

9. A drunk mans’ words are a sober mans’ thoughts.

10. Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.