Funny Quotes and Sayings

1. A lot of beautiful people are stupid. There’s a tremendous amount of idiots who look so good. It’s frightening.

2. With fame I become more and more stupid, which of course is a very common phenomenon.

3. When your dad is mad and asks you, “Do I look stupid?” Don’t answer him.

4. Never put off until tomorrow what you can avoid all together.

5. The universe is change; our life is what our thoughts make it.

6. Women complain about premenstrual syndrome, but I think of it as the only time of the month that I can be myself.
- Roseanne

7. Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.
- George Burns

8. Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I’m not sure about the former.
- Albert Einstein

9. Quitters never win, winners never quit, but those who never win and never quit are idiots.
- Anonymous

Funny Short Quotes and Sayings

1. It’s so simple to be wise. Just think of something stupid to say and then don’t say it.

2. STUPID = Smart Talented Unique Person In Demand.

3. If you have noticed this notice you will have noticed that this notice is not worth noticing

4. Divide and conquer.

5. If we let things terrify us, life will not be worth living.

6. Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love.
- Albert Einstein

7. Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.
- George Burns

8. Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I’m not sure about the former.
- Albert Einstein

9. Only the wisest and stupidest of men never change.
- Confucius